If you are one of the many couples who have had to postpone your wedding in the midst of this global pandemic, our hearts go out to you. That really sucks! Postponing is not fun and not something any couple wants to deal with.
But after you make the tough decision, reach out to your vendors, get in touch with your guests and peel the stamps off your save the dates, what do you do next? What happens once your wedding is postponed?
It is not only acceptable, but actually encouraged, to grieve after you’ve postponed your wedding. Sure, you may not have lost a loved one, but you did lose something. Even if you’re planning to have the exact same wedding a year later, your loss is still impactful.
Your wedding day is something you’ve been looking forward to and planning for weeks, months or years. And now it’s not going to happen exactly when or exactly how you hoped. That’s a loss and it’s totally okay if you feel bad about it. Don’t let anyone shame you or make you feel guilty about being bummed. You’re allowed to be sad and drown your sorrows in Netflix binges and ice cream.
Rely on your support network
This is the time to reach out to your support network. Even if you can’t see them like you normally would, connect virtually, get on the phone or meet up for a socially distanced picnic with friends and family. Rely on your people to boost your spirits, be a safe space for you to vent, or even get your mind off of your wedding.
You may also want to go online and connect with other couples who have had to postpone weddings. There you can commiserate, keep each other inspired and learn how others are handling their re-planned weddings.
Make a commitment now
Just because your wedding has been postponed doesn’t mean you have to wait to make a commitment. You can still make that pact with your partner, even in the middle of a pandemic. Many couples are choosing to elope now and party later, saving their big wedding for a safer time. Get in touch with us if you’d like to do this!
If you don’t want to get legally married right now, you can still make a commitment without the paperwork. Hold a virtual ceremony with an officiant (we know a few!) or an informal ceremony with just the two of you. You could also make your commitment by exchanging love letters, writing vows or even just having a really romantic date night.
Take a break
The great thing about postponing your wedding is you now have more time for wedding planning. That means you have time for a break. It’s totally understandable if you don’t want to jump into wedding planning right away. You may be grieving or worried that your wedding plans may change again. Consider this permission granted to step away from the Google Docs and Pinterest boards. Go enjoy some wedding-planning-free time!
On the other hand, some couples might find comfort in continuing to plan their special day. You may find with the pushed out date, you now have time to plan elements you thought you’d have to skip. If you’re worried about your new wedding plans changing, you can always work on elements that aren’t tied to a specific date. For example, you can work on your vows (check out our pay what you can vow writing course!) or tackle some DIY wedding crafts.
Mark your special day
Instead of dreading your original wedding date as it creeps closer on the calendar, do something special to mark the occasion. Some couples are choosing to put on their wedding outfits and celebrate by taking photos and cutting into a cake. You can open up a fancy bottle of wine, go out on a romantic date with your partner, have a Zoom call with your wedding party or whatever special thing you want to do to make your original wedding date a happy one!
Find new meaning
With your wedding postponed during a global pandemic, you might find your special day has taken on new meaning. Perhaps your wedding will be the first big family event when all of your relatives will be able to get together. With everyone looking forward to seeing one another, your wedding might be what brings them all together after a long time apart.
Or perhaps the postponement has made you realize you want your wedding to take on a new direction. Some couples are choosing to pare down their guest list and re-centre their celebration on what truly matters to them. Others are choosing to go all out and make it a party to remember! With a postponement, now is the time to figure out what is most important and what your wedding means to you.
Prepare for your marriage
Another silver lining of a postponed wedding? More time to prepare for your lifetime marriage! Now is the perfect time to invest in your relationship. Planning a wedding twice is hard, especially if you have to do it during a global pandemic with all the added stress and hardship that brings. If your relationship can weather that storm, you’ll know you’re on the right track.
If you want to ensure your marriage starts on the right foot, look into relationship coaching. Now is the ideal time to set a strong foundation for your marriage. Or if you’re struggling and need some relationship TLC, look into counselling options. We’ve got both relationship coaching and counselling available, and for 50% off our regular rates to help you through this tough time.
Our hearts go out to every couple who has had to postpone, cancel or alter plans because of the coronavirus pandemic. We know this is a tough time but we also know you can get through it. We can’t wait to celebrate your love with you once it is safe to do so!
written by Riana Ang-Canning