We are excited to welcome, Stephanie Reitsma, the owner of Sweetheart Events to the blog today.
Although Stephanie is usually inundated with wedding and reception details, we love that she took the time to write about how much she values pre-marital coaching (because we do too!). A slight variation of this article originally appeared on her blog.
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Newly engaged? Have you considered pre-marital coaching leading up to your big day? Friends, many couples laugh at me or immediately shake their heads and tell me they are not religious and don’t need it when I ask them about pre-marital coaching. I believe in long lasting marriages and want to help my couples strive after the wedding planning is done. I recently chatted with Shawn Miller, Owner of Young, Hip & Married to learn more about what it is, what to expect and why couples should invest in their marriage. I personally learned a lot and can’t wait to share this information with you.
Photo of SHE Couple Andrea & Thorsten by Gucio Photography
I love working with Shawn and his team of officiants. It’s not just us but our couples rave about them too!
So what is Pre-Marital Coaching? In simpler terms, it is designed to equip couples with the necessary tools for a long and successful marriage. They get down to the nitty-gritty with no religious content what so ever! It is not a group session, a weekend-long retreat answering uncomfortable questions and role playing but a session for just the couple and a marriage coach offering advice and working with you to create a successful marriage.
Shawn shared his personal experience with me, with his wife Erica, before they got married. They took pre-marital coaching not because of a requirement but because they truly believe in investing in their marriage. They had three older couples meet with them, ask them questions and share their own personal journey with them.
They taught Shawn and Erica what to expect, what marriage was like and equipped them with the tools to have a successful and happy marriage. These couples helped Shawn and Erica align their expectations and bring them back to reality to what marriage is all about. Pre-marital coaching isn’t about solving problems but about making relationships stronger. It doesn’t have to be broken to be fixed. Anything you want to last forever will take some work. Marriage is no different! Couples that invest in coaching have a 30% higher success marital rate than couples that do not and 44% of all couples today participate in pre-marital coaching according to
Anything you want to last forever will take some work. Marriage is no different! Couples that invest in coaching have a 30% higher success marital rate than couples that do not and 44% of all couples today participate in pre-marital coaching according to healthsearchfunding.org. Shawn’s advice for any couple is communication, honesty and making growing together a priority.
I read this quote recently and it really stuck with me, “many couples do not prepare for marriage but only the wedding itself.”. Your wedding lasts one day but your marriage lasts forever. It is important to remember to hit pause from time to time and focus on the relationship. When sending monthly checklists to my couples I enjoy adding date night or something relationship related to remind them of the marriage that waits for them after the wedding day.
Some couples go out and re-create their first date, they share top ten reasons they love about each other or even go off the grid for a day and spend it only with each other. Trust me it’s a lot of fun and a great excuse to spend time together. I challenge you, this weekend, hit pause on the wedding plans and spend time together. Ask each other those important questions and discuss your expectations of married life. What is the meaning of your marriage commitment? Will you have children and how will you raise them? How will you resolve conflict? How will you invest in your marriage moving forward? What are your expectations?
Does pre-marital coaching intrigue you? You can book a coaching session, read about their coaches or ask a question here.
“A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other” Young, Hip and Married
